where he leads, he drags me

November 30, 2014


Your progress in your own spiritual life does not consist in having the gift of consolation, peace or even your happiness. Instead it will be found in enduring the withdrawal of peace and even the loss of blessing; but to do so with humility, resignation, and patience, so that you neither become listless in prayer nor neglect your other duties in the least; but on the contrary do what you can do as well as you know how, and do not neglect yourself completely because of your anxiety of mind of feeling of loss.


It is the backside of the wilderness experience.  Moses in the desert for 40 years. The 400 years of silence between the Old Testament and the New Testament.  Elijah’s drought.


There are times when God hides his face, withdraws his presence. Predictably we do one of two things. We either chase God or we wait. You can guess where this is going. Chasing God is how we get into trouble. We try fads, emotionalism, promises to have better behavior, vows, we might fast, read our bible more.


It is God’s prerogative to give grace and to console when He wishes, as much as He wishes, and whom He wishes, as it shall please Him and no more.


Learning to wait on God is one of the paramount disciplines we can develop. It goes against our nature. If you were wise enough to remain always humble and small in your own eyes, and to restrain and rule your spirit well, you would not fall so quickly into danger and offense.


Habakkuk 3:19English Standard Version (ESV)

19 God, the Lord, is my strength;
he makes my feet like the deer’s;
he makes me tread on my high places.


It is while we wait in solitude, the manna has ceased to fall, and our lips are numb from unanswered prayers. Friends are gone, there are no more encouraging emails or phone calls, even worship seems to dry our bones. You have finally reached the place God desires for you.

 Alone, unsure, struggling, pride gone, foolishness has been washed away, your prayers have completely changed. Like the woman with the issue of blood, if only I could touch the hem of his garment.


Then it begins to rain, wonderfully you are in his presence, the tears that fall are tears of relief. The drought is over and you realize that the one thing you should have been looking for is the divine zero. There is no worth that you have, there is nothing you have to offer, slaves own nothing, and they can only be useful by being obedient.

It’s a different song you sing now, worship is different, you pray differently. Alas, it will only last a short time, you will soon be filled again with a sense of comfort and self-worth and this time don’t be surprised when you end up in a desert experience again. We seldom learn.


Thank God he is gentle and will lead us as he deems appropriate.


God bless from scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com





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