KNOCK, KNOCK

November 1, 2018

One day or another.

No deep insight here, Monday was a horrible day, trials, tribulation, failure, accusations. It would take to long to describe all the crap that took place in one day. Good news, none of it was spiritual or sinful, just people being mean or spiteful or having to deal with to many snowflakes.

Next day, wow, wonderful, great news, great happenings, victories, rewards, blessings, overcoming.

Third day, plain vanilla, no ups or downs, just do the day by rote.

So you ask what’s the point?

You never know when you answer the door if it’s a lion, or swat team with the wrong address, or rainbows and unicorns and trees with lollipops. (which would mean I’m having an acid flashback).

So like a boy scout (in the old days) BE PREPARED.

We talked about having enough rest, but is your spiritual gas tank full enough to get you through the day without a melt down.

Balance, work, play, pray, read your bible, eat well, enjoy life.

The longest, largest study in the world that determines why some people live to a ripe (healthy) old age, is human connections. The more friends you have the longer you will live. The more days you walk or swim, or lift even light weights or bicycle, the longer you will stay out of a nursing home.

I want to add one more thing to that, the more you read your bible, the more you will enjoy your salvation, love the Lord more and your brothers and sisters in Christ. And it may be possible, you may enjoy heaven even more, who knows.

So I pray tomorrow, no matter what life throws at you, you will handle it with grace.

God bless from scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com

Pray for those that weren’t gracious today, you might not know what is going on in their lives.

Pray for Jim A, his mother is failing rapidly

Pray for Steven H, and blessings for his family

Pray for Paul K, his mother is losing the battle to old age, her body and her mind is failing more each day and it is very hard on him. He was lucky to have great parents.

Pray for those that didn’t have great parents and are struggling in their own adulthood.

HEY, STUD

October 9, 2018

A bishop who had just had a cup of tea with a parishioner commented, “I’m glad to see in what a comfortable way you are living.” The churchgoer replied, “Oh, bishop, if you want to know how we really live, you need to come when you’re not here.” (Reader’s Digest [3/84], p. 16)

Unfortunately, a lot of Christians live that way, keeping up a good front to impress others with their spirituality. But if you knew how they really live, you’d find that they are faking it. They don’t live as authentic Christians. We all value authenticity, especially when it comes to our faith. But how can we know if our faith is genuine? What are the marks of authentic Christianity?

Many of the Colossian Christians had been unsettled by some false teachers who had arisen in their midst. They were telling these relatively new believers that they needed to observe designated holy days, avoid certain foods, and keep certain rules in order to be spiritual. They implied that the gospel which Epaphras had taught the Colossians was not complete or accurate. They needed to add the insights and rules of the false teachers to be genuine believers.

Paul wrote to the church to assure them that the gospel they previously received through Epaphras was the genuine item. It proved its authenticity by the fruit that it had produced in them and was producing in others everywhere it went. In so doing, Paul emphasized, as he often did, three virtues that are essentials of authentic Christianity: faith in Jesus Christ, love for other believers, and the hope of heaven. Also, in Paul’s opening comments, he reflects the authentic Christian virtues of thankfulness and prayer. Putting it together, we learn that …

Authentic Christians are marked by thankfulness and prayer, faith in Christ, love for the saints, and the hope of heaven.

It’s obvious that the Colossians were very different after they heard and believed the gospel which Epaphras preached. If people have not changed, we can assume that either the true gospel was not preached or that it was not believed. Belief in the true gospel results in the changes that Paul himself embodied and that he mentions here.

In many Pentecostal churches you will find more women in the congregation than men. My church therefore is an anomaly, we have more men than women (55%). It’s not a huge difference but it is different.

What always interests me is how my men test me to see if I’m genuine. When our church went interdenominational, we received even more men. I think we have more than our fair share of cops, FBI, a secret something and a homeland security. Maybe one attracts the other. With my military and government background it’s maybe not so surprising.

And since I hunt, reload, and shoot often we get a lot of shooters in church. So our men’s prayer Saturday is usually prayer, breakfast and then shooting. We trade knives, stories and once a quarter we have a saints and sinner dinner. We encourage the guys to invite someone that has never been to church. We grill steaks, have a little bourbon (one glass limit) and a cigar and then bible study, we call it “the holy smokes bible study”.

We have guys that won’t come to church but they will come to bible study and the dinners.

What interests me the most is how they watch the Christian men like a hawk, just waiting for them to slip up. I tell them we do have a few rules always in play, you can’t take the Lord’s name in vain, no dope, don’t show up drunk or high, no jokes about sex, no wife bashing, and you don’t have to hold hands when you pray. That last one draws a big sigh of relief.

I tell them anything I say in front of them I would say in the pulpit.

They are looking for a very real, genuine walk, and they want to see forgiveness in action. We do confess our sins to each other, either to the group or you’ll see some guys on one of the hiking trails or on the gun range having a serious come to Jesus conversation.

The one side effect I never saw coming was the wives saying thank you. My response is always “it’s not the goal of the church to neuter your husband” you can be a man and a good Christian.

Well that’s it for now, God bless from scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com

Pray for Ronnie S, life has been very hard for him and he needs a financial miracle.

(WELL I’M DOWN WITH THE CRUD, SO I REPOSTING MY PERSONAL FAVORITE DEVOTION)

SO WHO’S WITH ME, YOU WANT TO GROW UP AND BE A POTATO CHIP.

BETTER LET ME EXPLAIN, LAYS POTATO CHIPS THEY HAVE ONE THAT’S LABELED, ‘LIGHTLY SALTED; IN A WEIRD WAY IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT THAT EXPLAINS THE FOUR GOSPELS AND THE BOOK OF ACTS (NOT COMPLETELY BUT ALMOST).

GOD IS LIGHT, HIS SON IS LIGHT, AND WE ARE CALLED TO BE LIGHT. IN THE GOSPEL OF JOHN IT SAYS THAT DARKNESS (EVIL, THE DEVIL) CANNOT OVERCOME THE LIGHT OR EVEN UNDERSTAND IT. THAT’S HOW POWERFUL LIGHT IS.

SO WE ARE CALLED TO LIGHT.

WE ARE ALSO CALLED TO BE SALT

THE GOSPEL OF MATTHEW 5:13 SAYS WE ARE TO BE THE SALT OF THE EARTH. WE ARE TO BRING FLAVOR AND BE A PRESERVATIVE TO THE WORLD. BUT IF THE SALT LOSES ITS FLAVOR IT IS NO GOOD; AND THERE IS THE PROBLEM.

FOUR THINGS WE ARE SUPPOSED TO DO AS CHRISTIANS.ONE, BE LIGHT, TWO BE SALT, THREE BE CHRIST LIKE, AND FOUR BE MATURE.

WE CAN’T LEAVE ONE PART OUT, WE ARE TO SHINE IN DARKNESS AND LET THE WORLD KNOW A RESURRECTED CHRIST; WE ARE TO HAVE AN INFLUENCE IN THE WORLD THAT ACTUALLY STOPS OR RETARDS THE PEOPLE AND THEIR SINS (CONVICTION AND THAT GOD LOVES THEM). BE CHRIST LIKE IN ALL WE DO SO THE LIGHT SHINES FROM US. AND GROW UP SO WE CAN GROW OUT.

SO HERE’S MY PROPOSITION, SPEAKING JUST ABOUT AMERICA, WE HAVE PRETTY MUCH FAILED IN EVANGELISM, WITNESSING AND SPREADING THE HOPE OF GOD. SO EVERYTHING THAT IS WRONG IN OUR COUNTRY IS PRETTY MUCH THE CHURCHES FAULT AND OF COURSE THE SINFULNESS OF MAN.

ONE WE HAVE NO CONTROL OVER, THE OTHER WE DO. DON’T BLAME THE GOVERNMENT, OR POLITICIANS, THE QUESTION WE HAVE TO ASK IS ‘HAVE OUR LIGHTS GONE OUT AND IS THE SALT GONE FROM OUR LIVES.

HOW MANY FAMOUS TV AND BOOK PASTORS ARE SAYING THE BIBLE ISN’T HISTORICALLY RELEVANT, IT HAS NO PLACE IN THE PLACE OF MODERN MAN. HOW ABOUT ALL THE CHURCHES THAT HAVE ONE GOAL ON SUNDAY, TO MAKE YOU FEEL HAPPY AND GOOD ABOUT YOUR SELF (BIG NEWS FLASH, GOD DOESN’T ACTUALLY CARE IF YOUR HAPPY).

THERE IS A WELL KNOWN PASTOR NEAR HERE THAT TOLD ME HE HASN’T PREACHED A MESSAGE ABOUT SIN IN OVER 15 YEARS AND WOULDN’T BECAUSE HE THINKS THAT MESSAGE WOULD DRIVE THE CROWDS AWAY.

ASK YOUR SELF ‘WHY DO I GO TO CHURCH?’ HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN SINCE YOU’VE WITNESSED TO SOMEONE, OR TRIED TO HOLD A BROTHER OR SISTER ACCOUNTABLE FOR SOMETHING THEY ARE HAVING A PROBLEM WITH.

BE BIG

BE BOLD

BE BRAVE

SO TODAY WILL YOU RENEW YOUR VOW TO BE A POTATO CHIP, VOTE YES.

GOD BLESS FROM SCUMLIKEUSCHURCH@GMAIL.COM

KEEP ME IN PRAYER, I’M NOT A GOOD PATIENT

MY CONFESSION

September 18, 2018

My Confession;

Today I was cruel, masochistic, harsh, punishing, relentless, unforgiving, unfeeling and totally misused and abused to the point of death, finally killing; My Weed Eater.

Well now that I feel cleansed, how about you. How long has it been that you confessed your dirty little secret, or nasty habit or just said; “I’m sorry.”

Confession is good for the soul, and having someone to hold you accountable is a good thing.

That’s it, short and sweet, and if I don’t see you in church, I will see you at Home Depot.

God bless from scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com

Pray for Rick I, IBS

Pray for Carla and Sid, she’s about to become a new mom, any day now.

Pray for Jimmy W, he is just now coming to group meetings and should tell his story some day soon. He hasn’t hit the sobriety point yet, but he has a couple of meetings under his belt.

One of my favorites

September 16, 2018

Pinocchio and the unruly lady

Again unique to a Pentecostal church and for those of you that don’t attend a Pentecostal service you might just read this and think we are all just nuts; well maybe we are.

There was a lady who used to sit on the front pew in every service, Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday evening. Same place same spot. And she would wait for me to start preaching and as soon as I started to preach she would jump up and in the loudest voice start speaking in tongues and then give ‘her’ interpretation.

I asked her husband to please ask her to stop, because she would go on forever and I knew she had real issues with me and you just knew it wasn’t the timing of the Holy Spirit nor really a true message.

Well she wouldn’t quit, the deacons were upset, people in the church were upset and still she continued to do this.

I talked to her and she said she had no control over when the Holy Spirit wanted to move her. (which is not scriptural) I Corinthians 14:32 Remember that people who prophesy are in control of their spirit…

Now I usually preach in series, so you can kind of guess each Sunday where I’m going to go because I give outlines ahead of time so people can study and follow along, and one of the adult bible study groups share the outlines with senior citizen homes and some use them in their home study groups or with shut ins.

So now a theme is developing in her messages in tongues where she’s trying to preach my sermons before I can start. So now the deacons have gone to her and she still won’t stop. I’m about to bring the matter to a head in the service, but I decide to wait one more week and just pray more about it.

So now it’s next Sunday and wham off she goes loud and blustery, I’m about to step down and I can see her husband actually balling up his fists, he’s going to literally fight me over this. (Pastoring is so much fun).

When over in the next section about two pews back out steps the oldest, sweetest woman in the church. You know the type, the spiritual grandmother to everyone.

She steps up front, reaches up and pinches the lady’s nose shut. Our self-declared prophet opens her eyes expecting to see me and slap me and instead sees dear sister Ellen, who stills has a hold of her nose, and with this nose hold forces said prophet to set down. Sister Ellen leans in and whispers something to our out of control prophet; and man the color that comes to her face.

Next Sunday, no interruptions, no displays of hysterics, nothing the whole congregation and I are pleasantly surprised.

That Sunday as I’m shaking hands while everyone is leaving, sister Ellen comes up last and I stopped her and said; “just what did you say to our little trouble maker?”

This dear old saint and spiritual grandmother to half the church looks me in the eye and with the straightest face said; “I told her if she didn’t start behaving and respecting you I was going to kick her boney butt out the door.”

It was I all I could do to not just burst out laughing.

Man, you just have to love your flock, all of them, pastoring what a great gig.

God bless

Special prayers for ‘k’ we are praying for your son.

Pray for Maureen Lindner, shingles on her leg, she is in misery

Send your prayer requests to scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com

WORD OF MY DEMISE IS PREMATURE!

Imagine my surprise today to find out from my insurance company that my family (mother’s side) have signed and witnessed a statement that I’ve been dead three years now and they have collected the death benefits.

The insurance company is admitting negligence on their part and will be asking the family to return the money (good luck).

At first, I thought it was funny, hey my family is very dysfunctional. But as the day wore on it became a very grievous thought. That my family, full well knowing that I’m alive would have that much animosity to commit a crime and be that thoughtless of my feelings about my very own death.

Then I remembered this was the same family that never notified me of my mother’s death, or of my grandmother who raised me.

Now I will be the first to admit that as a kid I was one rotten hooligan.

I will take responsibility for being a delinquent. And I did give my mother a nervous breakdown. But hey, that was over 46 years ago.

Which proves a point, unforgiveness will lead to bitterness and possible revenge.

I took me a better part of the day to go to prayer and ask God to help me forgive them. I also know that this is a bridge that I burnt, and it will never be rebuilt.

I’ve never been home after I joined the military, my mother gladly signed the paperwork when I was 16 years old to get me out of her life. I thank God for the surrogate family that He gave me and the same for my children. That we were “adopted” by the family of God; and given new parents and my children their own grandparents.

And the irony has not escaped me that I haven’t heard from my daughter or grand-daughter for over 20 years. They followed the same destructive past I did. I can only pray (which I do) that they are godly adults, love the Lord and Serve Him.

Maybe our reunion may have to wait until we meet in heaven. I honestly don’t know what my initial reaction would be if I were to see my daughter. Hopefully not in a morgue.

Well enough of that gloom and sadness. I don’t have a monopoly on dysfunctional. Each of you could probably tell a tale yourselves.

But for the grace of God, thank God, that He gives us grace and gifts of wonderful people to fill our lives. I’m especially blessed as a pastor to have baptized infants and then did their weddings and now get ready to dedicate their grandchildren.

God bless from scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com

And a word of advice, if your family is abusive, toxic and harmful, get out, and get away. It is not “the Christian thing” to do and be harmed mentally, sexually and or emotionally. Run for your life and sanity.

the anti christ

August 20, 2018

Doesn’t it figure.

Daniel 11:36 “Then the king shall do according to his own will: he shall exalt and magnify himself above every god, shall speak blasphemies against the God of gods, and shall prosper till the wrath has been accomplished; for what has been determined shall be done. 37 He shall regard neither the [q]God of his fathers nor the desire of women, nor regard any god; for he shall exalt himself above them all. 38 But in their place he shall honor a god of fortresses; and a god which his fathers did not know he shall honor with gold and silver, with precious stones and pleasant things. 39 Thus he shall act against the strongest fortresses with a foreign god, which he shall acknowledge, and advance its glory; and he shall cause them to rule over many, and divide the land for [r]gain.

This is about the Antichrist. With all the horrible things he does, on top of that he is gay.

So we are looking for a gentile, military genius, who promises peace and is gay.

No wonder they call it “the end times”.

Blessings from scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com

watching over me

August 19, 2018

I was on a religious talk show today and was asked this question; “If you could recommend one thing to a Christian believer that would improve his/her walk, what would you say?

So of course the first speaker said; “God Loves you.”

Second speaker; “I agree with the first speaker” (real original guy)

Third speaker; “read your bible”

My turn; “remember God is watching all you do, every moment, in daytime or darkness, alone or in a group, God is watching.”

You know how dead air on the radio is bad thing?

The host and the others just sat there, and the moderator says; “do you think that is healthy, to think on that, all the time.”

My response, “the heart is dreadfully deceitful (Jeremiah 17:9 New International Version (NIV) The heart is deceitful above all things     and beyond cure.    Who can understand it?) and in sin my mother did conceive me.” New International Version=Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. (Ps, 51:5)

More dead air.

“Wow”, the moderator says, “do you feel guilty much?”

More dead air.

My response; “No, I feel fine, no guilt and no acting out, no secret sins, great walk with the Lord, because I know he is always watching.”

Third talking head, “oh, you mean you are worshipping all the time.” (sarcastically)

“No I mean, I may not always be conscience of His Presence but I never forget He’s always watching.”

Now four people are trying to tell me what I mean…….

Hhhmmmmmmmmmmm, I wonder if I’ll get invited back to that talk show again.

Want to live right, be upright, always in good standing,, clear conscience?

Duh!

Live, knowing He’s always watching, think before acting. Imagine Him always there. It’s good thing, you will want to live a life well pleasing to God.

And when I’m tempted, I just remembering He’s watching , modifies my behavior. I don’t want to grieve my Savior.

To many Christians don’t really in their heads believe it.

Live it, walk it, believe it, talk it.

God bless from scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com

Pray for Bethany Ann, born today with a bad heart valve, and many other complications.

Pray for Rathie, living on the streets and has come into a shelter for the first time. 30 years old, barely verbal autistic young man. Horribly traumatized by his homelessness.

hey, I know that voice

July 28, 2018

I get told all the time how wonderful my speaking voice is. That always cracks me up. I have a phone voice, a radio voice, a preaching voice, and my normal, I’m just being myself voice.

Funny thing is when I talk to people on the phone that haven’t met me, when I show up later and say “hi, I’m…..” they almost invariably go “really”, seems they picture me taller, or from the women, “ I thought Rock Hudson was going to show up, nope, you got Burl Ives.

The many years that I’ve done radio has always been funny because when my wife and I are out, especially in restaurants someone will always come over and say “hey, aren’t you that guy on station….”,

I’m doing a radio demo this weekend to see about doing a 3 hour talk show radio host. Just because of my voice and the radio station manager thought I was engaging.

Funnier still I was at the VA Hospital all day today and literally visiting every floor and every other floor someone would say; “hey you look familiar”.

As got off on one floor I heard the guy say; “do you know who that guy is?”

I guess I just got that kind of face or voice. Total strangers will come up to me at gas stations, in supermarkets.

One time they asked me to come set at their table and sign the menus.

I still don’t know who they think I am.

So devotional thought, do you know the voice of God, think you would recognize Jesus?

Closer to home, do you know the name of everyone in your church? We print a church directory with everybody’s name, picture and phone number and remind people every Sunday to call someone they don’t know in the directory and arrange to have lunch or dinner after the service. When we have fellowship dinners we put out place settings with names and make sure people don’t sit with their regular crowd, you wouldn’t believe the grumbling that causes sometimes. We have to keep the fellowship hall doors locked so people won’t’ go in and change their names around.

I just scratch my head sometimes. I need to tell you sometime my favorite church joke, it fits right in.

So this Sunday go up to someone you don’t know, say hello, invite them to lunch. Get out our of your regular church rut and see someone new. And if you’re feeling resistant to the idea (many of you are) ask yourself why.

God bless from scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com

The sheep know His voice, do you know your brother or sister in the Lord.

Ps. You want a prayer ministry? Take you church directory and start praying for the people in it by name. you will be surprised what happens.

when dogs pout

July 20, 2018

This ain’t real sophisticated, uber smart, deep theology or even original but it will help.

Prince had his hit song, “when doves cry”

I have when dogs pout.

This is our American Bulldog, not wanting to go to bed. Stubborn, pouting and not about to give in.

Sound familiar?

You don’t know what God is doing, you’re suffering, in pain or maybe it’s mental anguish; you’ve punished yourself better than anyone else. Finances are a mess, health is shot, marriage on the rocks, kids on drugs, one’s pregnant.

You’ve lost your job, done something stupid. Said something you wish you could take back.

Hey, you’re not alone we’ve all been there in one way or another. There is simply no way you can live long enough and not have some kind of suffering.

Two choices; Pout or Praise; that’s it. One makes it worse, one makes it better. The definition of insanity is doing the same wrong thing over and over and expecting different results.

You know what? Maybe no one is coming, there is no rescue, no pat on the back, no good news, pout or praise.

Believe this, you can prolong the suffering, pout, or get immediate relief, praise. The circumstances in either might not change. But your heart will, your mind will. You can get relief from pain by praising God, you can stop heartache by praising God. You can see a glimmer of hope praising God. Yes, it will probably suck again, but you can have moments of closeness with God, clarity of thought, a change of direction, just by praising God.

How come you ask or why?

Because in that moment of praising God, you stopped being the center of the universe. So stop being an asshat and stop pouting.

It might seem impossible, but just say it out loud. “God, I love you” start saying Hallelujah, just shout, “praise the Lord”. Lift up your head, wipe away the tears and believe God loves you and Jesus suffered more than you ever will. Thank God for your salvation.

Email us at scumlikeuschurch@gmail.com

We will pray for you, God bless.